Back yourself

My final article for 2018 is, therefore, about confidence. Let’s take stock of our mindsets as we head into another year when levels of aviation recruitment are unlikely to decline.

I was prompted to tackle this subject after a few recent, challenging coaching sessions involving strong personalities: those with an oppositional mindset and others who kept conversation close to their chests; larger than life characters and introverted achievers.

Whether you are larger than life, a wall flower, or somewhere in between, finding the line between confidence and arrogance applies to all personality types sitting across from a management team that holds your career in its hands.

Find that line and you will feel more comfortable backing yourself.

Backing yourself may be a simplified way of describing the complex ability to exude self-confidence without arrogance. In the world of aviation recruitment, it is an essential skill to master.

For obvious reasons we need pilots to have a solid grasp of their own ability and that comes down to their level of self-knowledge and competency in articulating it. That thinking also applies to other aviation careers. From management to engineering and customer service, it is a life skill that will serve you well when negotiating all interpersonal relationships.

To put it a different way, if an airline is unsure of you, whatever the role, your risk quota goes up. As we know, airlines always seek to mitigate risk in every aspect of their operation. On the other hand, if they hear consistent responses during any interaction with you then your risk quota goes down. You become more of a sure thing, so to speak.

Then comes your inevitable response: How do I sound confident without sounding cocky?

I will attempt to define the difference:
Self-confidence is a sense of self that is humble and assured, illustrated by humility and humour.
Cockiness often presents as ego driven, righteous or rowdy.

That’s my definition. You won’t find it in the Oxford Dictionary.
Perception can be tricky to navigate, even more so within the anxious confines of an airline interview. The solution, however, is somewhat easier than you might think.

It is all about the language, the language you choose when talking about yourself.

Walking that line becomes less of a problem when you find the right language to illustrate your ability, attributes and potential.

There is no single right type of demeanour or personality. There are people who demonstrate consistency in their approach and use facts to support their answers, and then there are those who do not. Facts hold the key to lowering your risk factor. Facts are the opposite of opinions.

‘It is all about the language you choose when talking about yourself.’

Here’s a simple example.

You could say “I am high achiever”. Now that feels uncomfortable doesn’t it? Why? Because it is your opinion of yourself, and that makes most of us feel a little weird or self-conscious. It’s pretty hard to back yourself if you are feeling that way as soon as the words drop out of your mouth.

How about we change the language to a fact-based statement, something like “I achieved all seven ATPL exams in three months with first time passes in all subjects”. Now that is a fact based response. It has nothing to do with how you feel about yourself or our opinion of what you did. It is simply a statement of fact. Easy. Some good low hanging fruit, ripe for the picking.

Confidence is many things. One thing that it is not, is what you think of yourself. Opinions, therefore, are banned.

If I created a ‘how to’ guide for exhibiting confidence it might look something like this:

> Guide, mentor and encourage rather than tell.
> Accept responsibly rather than blame.
> Acknowledge others’ points of view – even if you disagree.
> Bring the team with you, rather than running ahead of them.
> Use facts not opinions.
> Accept imperfections and refuse to be limited by them.
> You will never know everything so be open minded.
> Change is inevitable, embrace it.
> Whatever your age you have something to offer.
> Failure is our teacher; fail often and learn from it.
> Set high standards so you always have something to strive for.

When you communicate using facts, evidence and examples to illustrate the above you will be in that safe space – the one that demonstrates a solid sense of self and allows you to back yourself.

Those wonderful things called facts tend to do all the heavy lifting for you.
Leave opinions to those less evolved souls who only think they can.

2019 is going to be brilliant.