On The Airbands

“Do you see that green light out there madam?” “Yes”, said the old lady.

Then the hostie pointed out through the port window on the other side of the aeroplane. and do you see that red light over there?”

“Yes”, said the old lady.

“Well . . . ” said the flight attendant . . . “as long as the pilot keeps tne aeroplane between those two lights, we’re okay!”

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Interesting to reflect on the nicknames ATC and FIS staff allocate to various aircraft. Here’s a few from an anonymous (name supplied) Air Traffic Controller: Airbus A3OO- the truck; Boeing 727- thumpers; Ansett 737 – milk bottles (due to all white fuselages); Aust 737 – plastic maggots; Jetstream – fruitbats; Citation- floatation; A32O – death stars (unfair, I think, now that the full story of the French and Indian crashes has emerged); DHC-6 – twitter; Islander- bunny; Shorts 360 -shed; A32O -scarebus; Piaggio – pig (old one!); Mitsubishi Mu-2- rice rocket; Westwind – Israeli bomber; Cessna 172RG – gutless; Mohawk 298 – Pterodactyl.

* * *

Monitored by this writer on 5643 USB from Qantas 21 late one evening.

“Sydney Sydney, Qantas 21 on five six upper. IFR for Tokyo, preflight check, Selca! Delta Kilo Echo Juliet. ”

No Answer.

Again. “Sydney, this is Qantas 21, 5643, IFR for Tokyo, Selca! Delta Kilo Echo Juliet. ”

Auckland chips in. “Qantas 21 Auckland, go ahead. ”

Qantas 21 then recounts the selcal details and gets a successful check.

Auckland then enquires . . . ‘1’. h, Qantas two one Auckland, where exactly are you?”

“Auckland, this is Qantas 21 . . . we’re on the ground Sydney!” AUCKLAND: ‘1’. h . . . you wouldn’t have the latest on the football between NSW and Queensland would you?”

“Qantas 21, yes . . . when we were in Flight Planning it was sixnil NSW’s way!”

AUCKLAND: “Gee thanks Qantas 21, that’s great!” “Qantas 21, that’s about the last we heard. ”

AUCKLAND: ‘1’. lright mate!”

Certainly broke the monotony of routine reps that night for this little black duck!”

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Speaking of ‘Black ducks’, Geoff Gatward is fifteen years of age and lives near Perth International, and he understandably mistook the word for the actual RAAF Callsign Rootword ‘Backduck’. The pilot of VH-KWW also misheard the callsign.

It actually denotes a Caribou transport, as Geoff suspected. BACKDUCK 215: “Perth, Backduck 215, circuit area Pearce this time, call again after landing. ”

APPROACH: “Roger, after landing, if no contact, try Apron Clearance Delivery 133. 0, and traffic is Kilo Whiskey Whiskey, a Cessna 210, in your 12 o’clock, ten miles. ”

BACKDUCK 215: “Roger, copied traffic, and 133. 0. ” APPROACH: “Kilo Whiskey Whiskey, traffic is Backduck 215, your 12 o’clock, nine miles, make right turn 260 for separation. ” VH-KWW: ”Roger, 260 degrees . . . what’s a Black Duck?” APPROACH: “Something that swims and goes quack!”

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Historical (err . . . hysterical!) Section now. Circa 1958, with the star of the show a RAAF Canberra bomber, callsign VM-JBH, en route Darwin to Amberley. The pilot is a USAF exchange officer, and the conversation between Isa Control and old ‘Bravo Hotel’

went like this (according to Graham Sivyer. )

VM-JBH: ‘1’. h . . . Isa Control, Victor Mike Juliet Bravo Hotel, an air force jet, Darwin for Amberley, one hundred DME·lsa, estimate overhead Isa in one zero minutes, we’re at flight level five zero zero. ”

CONTROL: “Bravo Hotel, Isa Control . . . say again your flight level. ” (Sounds confused!)

VM-JBH: “Flight level five zero zero, Isa!”

CONT ROL: “Bravo Hotel, Isa . . . you mean fifty thousand?” VM-JBH: “You bet!”

CONTROL: “I bet you’re a bit cool up there. ”

VH-JBH: “Waal . . . if I wuz makin’ a Tarm Collins, I sure as hell wouldn’t need any ice. It’s minus sixty four degrees for your info!”

Graham Sivyer was a passenger on the Canberra, and the recollection is as near as possible to actual wording considering

the slight delay it has suffered in getting printed some 32 years later!

* * *

In NSW, some new frequencies and some old ones reallocated. Ansett Sydney is now on 130. 95 instead of the old 130. 65. East-West takes up Ansett’s even older 130. 6 vacating 128. 8. And finally, Hazelton Sydney is now on 135. 55. Thanks to Craig Murray from Terrigal for alerting me to the Hazelton frequency.

Craig asks: “How come I never seem to hear anybody on the Transcontinental Control frequency 128. 2? I have never heard anything. ” Craig, it’s only very rarely I hear anything on it from where I live in Sydney. The frequency has its Ground Station antenna at Mt Oxley, near Bourke. Just occasionally, with an aircraft at FL 390 or above, ‘with the squelch out’, I’ll hear the aircraft. I will never hear the ground station unless there is some heat ducting doing strange things with the VHF signal from there. Once an aircraft calls on 128. 2, it is received by the antenna site, located at a CAA Earth Station and uplinked to the Aussat satellite transponder. From there it is received in Sydney at the Area Control Centre, and is cross patched in with 131. 3 or 118. 5. Audio is retransmitted, so listen on 131. 3, and you’ll hear both sides. Or the UHF equivalent 342. 9. * * * Another good piece I happened to hear recently, all true, except for the Captain’s name which had been changed for obvious reasons. New Zealand 115, a Boeing 747-200 completing its last thirty minutes of its Tasman crossing, before turning around the aeroplane with the same crew to return home as New Zealand 116. They call Qantas Sydney on 131. 7 about 90 miles DME from the

Sydney VOR. ANZ 115: “Qantas Sydney, New Zealand 115, we’ll be on the

blocks at four seven, we’ve got a problem with the forward exit door, even though it’s closed and locked, it’s not recessing on

the outside properly. We have no sick people on board, or unaccompanied minors, and we’d like our return passenger load figures for the New Zealand 116 please. ” QANTAS SYDNEY: “New Zealand 115, Qantas Sydney, copy

your door engineering problem, and your other remarks. Return load is 11 first class, 53 Pacific, and 112 economy. ”

ANZ 115: “Right! Thank you . . . and err . . . ah . . . our Captain, Captain Freebird . . . it’s his last flight for Air New Zealand, and he has

his wife on the aeroplane and she’s returning with us on New Zealand 116. Could you get one of the staff from the boarding

lounge to run in on arrival and give Mrs Freebird her return boarding pass, as she doesn’t wish to leave the aeroplane, she

won’t be disembarking. ” QANTAS SYDNEY: (trying to be helpful) “Er . . . New Zealand 115,

would you be kind enough to enquire of the Captain would Mrs Freebird prefer a Smoking or a Non Smoking allocation for her

return trip. ” CAPTAIN FREEBIRD: “Qantas Sydney, this is Captain Freebird.

Look . . . I don’t care what you allocate her, she’s going in First Class, Non-Smoking! And that’s that!”

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If you are just starting out in aviation monitoring or you’re an old hand at tuning in, my new book The Australian Airband Guide’ is available for just $24. 95 plus $3 p&p from Airband Communications, PO Box 301, Chester Hill 2162.

It’s got everything you want to know about aviation radio in Australia, worldwide HF listings, hundreds of selcal codes, and much more. Go for it! * * * Some good frequencies for our western cousins provided by TV news cameraman Steve Worner who works for TV channel 1o in _ Perth. Steve owns a Realistic PRO-2004, AOR 2001, Sony Air-7, and Kenwood R-1000 for HF listening. He’s recently flown

on the inaugural British Airways 747-400 from Perth to Auckland, and the Antonov 124. The six crew 124 flight deck was ‘archaic’ says Steve. Anyway, to the channels he provided us Qantas Perth ITS (International Terminal Building) 464. 95,

British Airways 1TB 493. 0, Ansett (Domestic Terminal) 463. 675, and all the international carriers use 131. 9 for company messages. RAAF training is being monitored on 260. 9.

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Finally some STUD frequencies provided by Russell Bryant, a good mate and Scanning Action columnist with ‘CB Action’ from

Melbourne. Russ “got them from a computer bulletin board and wants to share ’em!” These are all for use in NSW by the way:

STUD 1 264. 3 Williamtown SMC; STUD 2 257. 8 Williamtown Twr; STUD 3 293. 4 Williamtown Departures; STUD 4 261. 4 Williamtown Approach; STUD 5 254. 7 Williamtown Traffic; STUD 6 317. 8 Williamtown Par; STUD 7 338. 5 Williamtown Fir’li:11 Par; STUD 8

257. 3 Williamtown Twr; STUD 9 289. 4 Richmond GCA; STUD 10 363. 8 Sydney Control; STUD 11 260. 0 Assau. lt Range; STUD 12

301. 1 Baron Operation (Willy 3 SQD). Thanks Russell, I’ll reciprocate soon.

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Ifyou’d like to contribute to ‘On the Airbands’, write to me, Bob Bell, at Box 3105 Weston Creek, ACT 2611. Enclose a stamped self addressed envelope for a reply please. Until next month, good monitoring!