On The Airbands

I have not experienced a death by any person on any aircraft I have flown on but someone I am close to has and she tells me it’s a most unpleasant kind of experience for all concerned.

* * *

John Williams from Cambridge in Tasmania asks me if I’m aware of the steps that hang down from some Cessna 31Os until the gear is raised. Remembering those steps, the following conversation was overheard by John at Heathrow:

BRITISH MIDLAND VISCOUNT: “Alpha Bravo, you’ve still got your steps down!”

CESSNA 310: ‘Thanks, but they go up with the wheels!” VISCOUNT: “You really do have people changing their minds that late?”

* * *

Another from John. Edinburgh Tower (UK) is advising QNH setting.

EDINBURGH TOWER: “Bealine, set QNH to 1008. 5. ” BEALINE: “1008, set. ”

TOWER: “Decimal five. ”

BEALINE: “Sorry, our Trident doesn’t take halfpennies!”

These two memorable stories were apparently written up originally in Roger Bacon’s ‘Straight and Level’ in Flight International, so John tells me. Thanks again to John Williams and write again soon.

* * *

Geoff Rees, former Qantas skipper, now with Aquatic Airways at idyllic Palm Beach in NSW, relates this small conversation from his OF days.

US CONTROLLER: “Qantas four-heavy, say altitude. ” QANTAS 4: “Okay . . . A-L-T-I-T-U-D-E!”

US CONTROLLER: “Very smart Qantas, now say CANCEL IFR. ”

QANTAS 4: “You got me, nine thousand five hundred!”

Now hands up all those aviators who have at some point in their career done this!.

* * *

A neat little airband transceiver for VHF is the lcom IC-A20 (refer Product Test p. 66 Jan 89 AA), which would be great in your flight as a backup comms set. Sixteen memory channels, three scans and one touch access to 121. 5 MHz emergency fre quency. It also puts out five watts of RF power and has a Navigation Function built in. The radio will digitally display the radial heading to or from a VOR station and includes a Course Deviation Indicator, so your course heading can be checked out as you cruise. I haven’t had a lengthy play with one yet, but three totally independent sources tell me the radio is a good one. If you’ve tried this lcom handheld out, or perhaps own one, I’d love to hear what you think of the radio in active service.

* * *

Albert Trager from Boise Idaho in the USA, tells me about one of those days when you could almost see forever, not a cloud or ripple in the sky. Just like you’re hung up there on a hook . . . know the feeling?

Two aircraft were working the Atlanta Centre, en route to Charlotte, in North Carolina. One was an Eastern 727 and the other a Cessna Skylane, about 20,000 feet below the jet airliner. ATLANTA CENTRE: “Eastern 617, what are your flight conditions today?”

In their mind’s eye, both pilots visualised the dark radar room, with its centre aisle lined with radar consoles and the controller hunched over his scope, watching the glowing orb.

OLD SOUNDING EASTERN CAPTAIN: “Son . . . this is certainly the kind of day you hate to think you’re being paid for it!”

* * *

Dallas Love Field, with a considerable delay and a long line of aircraft inching along. Many air carriers and one lone Cessna Skylane. The Skylane pilot, looking off to his right notices a newly paved mile long taxiway and immediately asked Ground Control if they would allow him to use that taxiway for his takeoff. “Nope”, was the reply, “I don’t think the City of Dallas would approve of that, but we do have fourteen hundred feet of runway 13 you can use, if that’s sufficient?” The Skylane pilot replied . . . “Great! I only need 800 feet to be off and flying!”

Ground Control then advised the Skylane pilot to pull off next intersection from where he was located, make his run up and advise Tower when he was ready for takeoff. A short pause followed, then another voice:

UNKNOWN AIRCRAFT: “How about asking that Skylane pilot if he’d like to trade jobs just for this afternoon, so I can get home!”

* * *

Kurt Barth works as a Load Controller with Ansett Airlines in

Launceston, Tasmania. It’s great to have contact again with the ‘Apple Isle’. Scenario, VH-TJS, a Douglas DC-9 was inbound from Sydney and overhead Launy at 5,000 feet. VH-KAM, a DH. 114 Heron was outbound, in Launceston for Flinders Island and on reciprocal track to the DC-9.

LAUNY TOWER: “Tango Juliet! Sierra, opposite direction traffic is Kilo Alpha Mike, at 4,000 feet, advise sighting and passing. ” VH-TJS: “Is that a Navajo?”

TOWER: “Negative . . . a Heron, four engines!” VH-KAM: (quick as a flash) “Two more than you!”

There was no response from the obviously sulking DC-9 technical crew. Ansett Launceston is to be heard on 130. 6 MHz.

* * *

Out of Sydney for Rome, Qantas 5 was on frequency 131. 3 during the period of the Controller’s work to rule caused by Departmental inaction over pay and outdated equipment.

The aircraft was tracking Katoomba, Parkes, across to Derby and requested an abbreviated track, direct present position to Tango 34 Alpha, an INS waypoint. Control said, “No, I’m afraid that’s not possible and there is an AIP laid down concerning such direct tracking out of radar coverage. ”

Qantas 5 then stated he had believed that the aeroplane would still have been inside radar coverage, to which Control said: “No I’m sorry, we’ve only got radar coverage to twenty miles west of Parkes”.

A short while later, Control stated he considered he was lucky to even have that sometimes! Qantas 5 reported: “Yeah, I suppose that old World War II surplus equipment is getting a bit testy now!”

Monitored by your columnist, confirming the airlines stated – support for the overworked, underpaid and poorly equipped Sydney Air Traffic Controllers.

* * *

Appropriate at this point, from Campbell Sharp of Annesley, Qld, the three greatest lies in the aviation world.

1. “The cheque is in the mail”

2. “Of course I’ll still respect you in the morning!”

3. “I’m from the Department and I’m here to help you!” Touche!

* * *

Keith Smith-Ryan related a small incident which occurred on an Australian Airlines flight from Melbourne to Perth one recent Monday afternoon. Our correspondent himself hails from Kingsley, WA.

Heard over the public address intercom on board:

FIRST OFFICER: “This is your First Officer and I think you’d better join me in a prayer!”

Everyone on board apparently gasped and looked towards the engines, fearing an engine failure or fire. No such problem was evident.

Suddenly, the First Officer’s voice again:

FIRST OFFICER:”. . . Yeah, we’ve just lost another batsman and it sounds as though we’ve also done the Second Test!”

* * *

Commander D A Francis, RAN who is currently on exchange duty with the US Navy, living in Mechanicsburg, Pennsylvania has written to ‘On the Airbands’. He tells of the time when he was a young Lieutenant aboard HMAS Melbourne, on a beautiful autumn day early in 1975. The carrier was off Jervis Bay, carrying out the very boring task of three dimensionally mapping the warship’s radar coverage area, using a chartered Learjet, flying back and forth at high altitude. Our Lieutenant visited the ATC Officer, who like the pilot aloft, was exquisitely bored. At the end of the sortie, the ATCO suggested the pilot might like to fly one carrier controlled approach letdown, culminating in a low level overshoot.

The pilot agreed and when the Lear was half a mile out, our Lieutenant made a dash down to the flight deck to watch the overshooting Lear. There were only two young sailors on deck, both without shirts, enjoying the sun while painting a new runway centreline on the deck in yellow paint. Looking for some fun, our young Officer yelled “lookout” and pointed towards the now rapidly approaching Lear, which had landing lights blazing and flaps and gear down, approaching at 130 knots. The sailors froze, jaws drooping, eyes wide, then they executed their own spectacular takeoff, scattering brushes and cans of paint along with a ghetto blaster radio in their haste to save their own lives! They cleared the landing area just in time to watch the sleek jet fly by the port beam and gracefully depart for home.

The Lieutenant received some mighty aggressive looks and as such decided to execute his own graceful departure! The boring day drifted on, with only the fresh trail of yellow footprints on the flight deck as sole evidence of the moment of alarm for the hapless young sailors!

* * *

Write to me, Bob Bell, at PO Box 105, Weston Creek, ACT 2611 and be sure to include a stamped self-addressed envelope if you would like a reply. We’re concluding this edition of ‘Airbands’ with the Atlantic HF frequency list for your information, use and enjoyment.

Till next time . . . good monitoring! NORTH ATLANTIC/SOUTH ATLANTIC HF RADIO:

CAMBRIDGE BAY: nat d 2971, 4675, 8891, 11279.

ICELAND: nat b 2899, 5616, 8864, 11279, 13291; nat c 2962, 5649, 8879, 11279, 13306; nat d 2971, 4675, 8891, 11279, 13291.

CHURCHILL: nat d 2971, 4675, 8891. IQALUIT: nat d 2971, 4675, 8891, 11279. BODO: nat d 2971, 4675, 8891, 11279.

NEW YORK: nat a 3016, 5598, 8825, 13306, 17946; nat b 2899, 5616, 8864, 13291, 17946.

GANDER: nat a 3016, 5598, 8825, 13306; nat b 2899, 5616, 8864, 13291; nat c 2962, 5649, 8879, 13306; nat d 2971, 4675, 8891, 13291.

SHANWICK: nat a 3016, 5598, 8825, 13306, 17946; nat b 2899, 5616, 8864, 13291, 17946; nat c 2962, 5649, 8879, 13306, 17946; nat d 2971, 4675, 8891, 13291, 17946.

SAN JUAN: nat a 3016, 5598, 8825, 13306.

SANTA MARIA: nat a 3016, 5598, 8825, 13306; nat b 2899, 5616, 8864, 13291.

CANARIES: nat a 3016, 5598, 8825, 13306, 17946; sat-1 3452, 6535, 8861, 17955; sat-2 2854, 5565, 11291, 13315, 17955. PARAMARIBO: nat a 3016, 8825; sat-1 8861; sat-2 11291. SAL: sat-1 3452, 6535, 8861, 13357, 17955; sat-2 2854, 5565, 11291, 17955.

DAKAR: sat-1 3452, 6535, 8861, 13357, 17955; sat-2 5565, 11291, 13315, 17955.

SALVADOR: sat-1 3452, 8861; sat-2 5565.

RECIFE: sat-1 3452, 8861, 13357; sat-2 5565, 10096.

Abbreviations: nat – North Atlantic region; sat – South Atlantic region. Aircraft flying polar routes use nat d